"The global increase in surface temperature (known as global warming) was found to impact on mortality through ill health, particularly among the elderly and in summer. This study sets out to explore the impact of global warming on suicide mortality, using data from Italy."
And the results?
"For males, increasing anomalies in monthly average temperatures associated to a higher monthly suicide mean from May to August and, to a lower extent, in November and December. In January, on the other hand, increasing anomalies in monthly average temperatures appeared to be coupled to a lower number of suicides. For females, the links between temperature and suicides are less consistent than for males, and sometimes have a reverse sign, too."
So men are in trouble with global warming? Temperatures will start rising, and I'll be mysteriously drawn to throw myself out the window. A hot day comes along, and I'll just want to shoot myself. I start sweating, and I'll want to dig through the medicine cabinet for something to overdose.
By the way, an interesting limitation of the study:
"The use of monthly data, instead of daily data (unavailable), is another major limitation of this study."
Let me get this straight: These suicides may have gone up during the coldest days of the month, but we are going to attribute increased suicides to global warming?
Another curious thing which was not mentioned in the extract I read: During the period of the study (1974-2003), Italy's economy was going downhill. You don't suppose that could have caused an increase in suicides among men, do you? Nah, it's gotta be the global warming...
(hat tip to DrudgeReport for the link)