A Chronicle of Enterprising Demises
Honoring those who improve the species...by
accidentally removing themselves from it!
Just to show you one of the kinds of stories to expect there:
From Randy Cassingham's book, The Stella Awards.
(2003, California) John, a Los Angeles real estate attorney, was skimming leaves from his pool when he noticed a palm frond caught in the power lines. His education had equipped him with sufficient acumen to become a successful litigator. Yet he was not shrewd enough to avoid becoming a toasty critter, when he reached up with the long metal pole and poked at the palm frond.
John was, for once, the path of least resistance.
Perhaps as an homage to his litigation skills, his family sued both the utility company and the pool supply store, for failure to disclose the danger of poking a metal rod into the power lines.
I mention the Darwin Awards because I was reminded of them when I was reading a story linked from Drudge Report at the Daily Mail website, titled "Meet the women who won't have babies - because they're not eco friendly":
Had Toni Vernelli gone ahead with her pregnancy ten years ago, she would know at first hand what it is like to cradle her own baby, to have a pair of innocent eyes gazing up at her with unconditional love, to feel a little hand slipping into hers - and a voice calling her Mummy.
But the very thought makes her shudder with horror.
Because when Toni terminated her pregnancy, she did so in the firm belief she was helping to save the planet.
Incredibly, so determined was she that the terrible "mistake" of pregnancy should never happen again, that she begged the doctor who performed the abortion to sterilise her at the same time.
He refused, but Toni - who works for an environmental charity - "relentlessly hunted down a doctor who would perform the irreversible surgery.
Finally, eight years ago, Toni got her way.
At the age of 27 this young woman at the height of her reproductive years was sterilised to "protect the planet".
Let us thank Toni for protecting the planet from the stupidity of any potential offspring she might have!
I have always believed that stupid people should not reproduce. But what can you say about someone who is so stupid they voluntarily jump out of the gene pool?
Later in the article, the story mentions a couple, Sarah Irving and Mark Hudson, where he got a vasectomy in order to "reduce [their] carbon footprint". As a side benefit to the rest of humanity, they also reduced their genetic footprint.
Personally, I believe all environmentalists should follow the lead of these three people and self-sterilize. In order to promote this position, I would like to honor Toni Vernelli, Sarah Irving, and Mark Hudson, with a Darwin Award, for taking their insane political views to their logical extreme.