Thursday, February 16, 2006

The Cheney Scandal: Some Funny Stuff

While the Media continues it's hissy fit over the Cheney hunting scandal, I thought I would point out some really funny stuff floating around the internet about it.

Over at Q and O, McQ refers to the scandal as "Fuddgate". I can see it now: "I've got you now, you swewy lawyer!"

You can't browse a blog without tripping over this gem from "The Daily Show":

Jon Stewart: “I’m joined now by our own vice-presidential firearms mishap analyst, Rob Corddry. Rob, obviously a very unfortunate situation. How is the vice president handling it?

Rob Corddry: “Jon, tonight the vice president is standing by his decision to shoot Harry Wittington. According to the best intelligence available, there were quail hidden in the brush. Everyone believed at the time there were quail in the brush. And while the quail turned out to be a 78-year-old man, even knowing that today, Mr. Cheney insists he still would have shot Mr. Whittington in the face. He believes the world is a better place for his spreading buckshot throughout the entire region of Mr. Whittington’s face.”

Jon Stewart: “But why, Rob? If he had known Mr. Whittington was not a bird, why would he still have shot him?”

Rob Corddry: “Jon, in a post-9-11 world, the American people expect their leaders to be decisive. To not have shot his friend in the face would have sent a message to the quail that America is weak.”

Jon Stewart: “That’s horrible.”

Rob Corddry: “Look, the mere fact that we’re even talking about how the vice president drives up with his rich friends in cars to shoot farm-raised wingless quail-tards is letting the quail know ‘how’ we’re hunting them. I’m sure right now those birds are laughing at us in that little ‘covey’ of theirs.

Even though this is so very liberal, it is still funny to me.

Here is a good one from Michelle Malkin's website:

Reader C.T. writes: "I'd rather hunt with Dick Cheney than ride with Ted Kennedy."

Along this same line of thinking, SayAnything had a contest. The winner:

"Miike: I'd rather hunt with Dick Cheney than get between Michael Moore and a buffet table!"

I would be remiss to leave out my favorites from David Letterman's "Top Ten List: Top Ten Dick Cheney Excuses""

3. "Excuse? I hit him, didn't I?"

2. "Until Democrats approve medicare reform, we have to make some tough choices for the elderly"

Of course, Letterman has been having a field day with this. Some examples from his other "Top Ten" lists this week:

Top 10 Things You Don't Want To Hear On Valentine's Day

...1. "Damn. I thought you were a quail"

Top Ten Good Things About Winning A Gold Medal (Presented By Olympic Gold Medal Winning Speed Skater, Chad Hedrick)

...1. It deflects stray gunshots from Dick Cheney

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